Okay, I'm about a month behind, sorry. In the middle of April I had to go to London to present at the Political Studies Association Annual Conference. The conference went well, and Angela got a couple of days in Jolly Ol'. We flew in from Nice the night before I was supposed to present. This trip was a nightmare, and I can give you details if you ask, but it's too long to go into now.
We landed at Gatwick at about 7:30 pm. In case you've never been to London, Gatwick is about 30 to 45 minutes outside of Central London. On the flight we bought two tickets for the Gatwick Express which brings you right into Victoria Station. At this point, I want to say that EasyJet sucks, but the Gatwick Express was fantastic. It was the best part of this trip. We were staying in efficiency apartments in the borough of Islington, which is on the northeast side of London. We took the Gatwick Express to Victoria and then got on the Underground to get to our hotel. The Underground took about 45 minutes to get halfway across London. Moreover, the nearest metro stop is about a half-mile from our hotel. This wouldn't have been so bad, but the wheel on our suitcase blew out in Nice. I basically had to drag a 45 pound bag through the streets of London at about 9:30 at night. We got into the hotel and had no food and sure as hell weren't going to eat out in London if we could avoid it. We went across the street to the smallest store I've ever purchased food in and somehow put together a really tasty dinner.
The next day was the conference, which happened to be on the southwest side of the city, as far from my hotel as you can get by metro. At this point I want to say that the London Underground has a reputation as being fantastic, but it is the worst urban transport system I have ever seen in my life. It is slow, unreliable and illogical. We finally got to the conference, and it went fine, which was good.
That night I saw my friend Ana from high school who I haven't seen in a decade and lives in London. This was possibly the best part about England. We went to a pub called Ye Olde Cheshire Cheese, which apparently dates back to the 1500's. The food was decent pub food, the beer was good and the company was better. I would recommend stopping at this pub if in London, it's in the shadow of St. Paul's and was just a nice place.
The next day we went to Stonehenge. I don't know what all the fuss is about. It's a bunch of rocks stacked on each other, but it was another sight I can say I've seen. We got back to London and needed to do some serious sightseeing. We began in Kensington and decided to walk. We walked past the British Museum, but didn't go in as the line was about a mile long. I would have liked Angela to see the Rosetta Stone and the frieze from the Parthenon, but we'll just have to go back. We then walked to Harrod's, which is the most amazing store I have ever seen. It was huge, glitzy and glamorous. There was something called the Egyptian escalator, which was an escalator room that looked like if you had put an escalator in a pyramid. The room with the food was amazing, the flowers in the perfume area were gorgeous, and the wine cellar was unbelievable.
From Harrods we walked down past Parliament, Westminster Abbey and Big Ben. We cross the river and walked along the south side of the Thames, which is the most disgusting river I have ever seen. I don't think it actually has water in, at this point it is free flowing sludge and pollution. We walked down to the Tower Bridge, crossed it and walked up past the tower of London. That night we went home and cooked for ourselves again.
The next morning we had a 7:30 easyJet flight out of Gatwick. This is where the shit hit the fan. We got up at 4:30 am to get to Victoria by 5 and catch the Gatwick Express at 5:15. That would be at 30 minute trip to Gatwick and we would be just fine. Here's what really happened:
4:30 - Woke up
4:45 - Left the hotel
5:00 - Got to the metro stop
5:02 - Realize the metro stop is closed
5:03 - Realize the metro doesn't open until 6:57
5:04 - Bitch and complain, seriously what "Major World City" doesn't open the subway until 7am?
5:10 - Begin to panic
5:11 - Find a bus stop
5:20 - Decide the bus won't get us to Victoria in time
5:23 - Decide to get a cab
5:24 - Realize we have no Pounds left (JUST USE THE DAMN EURO BRITAIN!)
5:25 - Get 20 Pounds from an ATM
5:27 - Hail a cab and ask him how much to Victoria, his response was "About 20 quid." and for those of you who don't speak whatever language it is they speak in Britain that is 20 Pounds.
5:28 - Get in cab
5:38 - Begin to worry as we approach Victoria but realize the meter is about to hit 20 Pounds.
5:40 - Tell the cabby we only have 20 Pounds. He said not to worry.
5:44 - Get dropped off right at the Gatwick Express.
5:45 - Leave for the airport on the train
6:15 - Get in line for our flight. It is important to note that 6 other easyJet flight were leaving between 7:30 and 8 that morning, so we were at the back of about 1,000 people waiting to get on a flight. You know how they say be there at least an hour before take-off, well with easyJet try 4 hours before your 7:30 departure.
7:20 - We got called out of line because our flight was leaving soon. We were put on a slightly shorter but slower moving line.
7:35 - We finally got moved up to someone to check us in.
7:36 - He says, "Do you have your confirmation number?" We say, "No." He chastises us and says, "Next time you should bring your confirmation number." (Trust me easyJet there will not be a next time). I said to his comment, "Next time you don't leave us standing in line for over an hour." At this point he refuses to check us in. Long story short, we got checked in, but easyJet is staffed by the most dickish group of douches I have ever met, never fly them, I repeat, NEVER FLY EASYJET! He tells us that the gate is closing and that we might be able to make it if we run.
7:40 - Get to security and see no one else there.
7:42 - The moronic security "officer" at Gatwick makes Angela unpack her gels and creams because the ziplock bag we have them in isn't one of their identical ziplock bags. My first question is, why do we have to use their bags. This is especially an important question considering no one had made her repack her bag in our many travels in the last 2 months, and what is the difference. Angela said that she had been traveling with that bag for a month already. The security "officer" told her they are trying a new procedure. The best part about this is that it was Easter weekend coming up. They decided at good time to try a new procedure was Easter weekend!
7:50 - We got through security and began walking to the gate, which was no exaggeration, over 1 mile away. Angela had had foot surgery 4 weeks earlier and couldn't move fast, but tried to run. Finally, I told her to walk and that I was going to run and try and talk them into keeping the door open until she gets there (my thought was at the very least delay the flight attendant long enough for Angela to get there). I took off running and lo and behold, when I got there, they hadn't even begun boarding yet. If you remember, the man who checked us in told us the gate was closing. We ran through Gatwick Airport, Angela on two surgically repaired feet, because the douchebag at the counter told us it was closing, when in fact it hadn't even begun boarding. Douchebags doesn't even begin to describe these people.
The plane took off at about 8:15 with us on board. The long and the short of this story is that London is not that great (not that bad either, but not that great). The transportation system is antiquated, the people are nice (although I don't know what language they speak) and easyJet is the worst airline I have ever flown in my life. Please tell everyone you know to avoid easyJet like it was some hybrid form of the plague and leprosy.
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